Life

Sometimes its hard.  Sometimes its full of joy.  Sometimes you want to laugh, cry, rejoice, run, shout, or get mad.  But one thing is true about life.  I personally wouldn't want to go through it without God. 

That being said..I love my family!!!!  Damon and Makayla are everything to me and everyday I feel so lucky to be his wife and her mommy.  Being a wife and mommy is the best job I could have ever prayed for, hoped for, or wanted in life.  I'm really lucky that I get to stay at home..I know alot of women don't have that priviledge. 

I'd give my life for these two....

"My cup runneth over"

:-)

Standing up for what you believe in

More and more, you read and hear about people standing up for the things they believe in.  While that is good in most instances, others it can be questionable.

Let me try to explain my feelings.

My Bible teaches me what is right..and what is wrong.  What is sin..and what is not.  Its black and white.  There are no 'gray' areas..God made the Bible plain and simple for us to understand.  Why is it then, people are treating some sin as if its nothing to worry about.  They stand up for things that are SINFUL..instead of standing AGAINST it.  Its scary.

Standing against sin doesn't make you judgemental.  I feel that if anything, your an 'aware' Christian..your aware of what the particular sin is.  After all..God loves the sinner..but not the sin. 

There are alot of things I could write on this subject..alot of things going through my mind as I type this post.  But the one thing I guess I want to convey most is this....

'Be mindful of the things you stand for.'

What to do..what to do...

Its been a rough couple of days here at "Country Roads".  I've been battling a cold for a couple days now..SCARED to death I'm going to give it to Makayla.  So I've been washing my hands like crazy and being as careful as one can be while praying she doesn't catch what I have.  Her first cold scares me!!!!  But anyways..I've been going thru some other 'trying' things that I thought I would share with you all without going into too much detail (as not to bore you with my troubles).

I went through some stuff on the lovely land of facebook with my step daughter a few weeks back.  While sharing what I felt was a lovely saturday morning with my little family..I felt totally attacked by my step daughter.  She drilled into me how I needed to be reading to Makayla and not let her watch tv.  Thing is..I DO read to my little girl.  And sing to her.  And play with her.  And yeah..we watch tv with her a little too.  I totally felt attacked and sent her a short email telling her my feelings.  We basically haven't gotten anywhere in regards to the whole situation unless you call not talking to each other a resolution.  Right now..its what is best I feel. 

There are things about her (that I'm not going to go into detail on here) that I've questioned since day 1.  Things that I don't agree with..things that are morally, spiritually wrong.  Things I don't want my daughter exposed to.  Or taught is right.  I feel like I'm in 'momma bear' mode since all of this has happened.  I want to protect my daughter from things of this world..there are things I don't want her exposed to..though I know I can't shield her from every bad thing out there.  Its one of the downfalls to parenting.  You want to protect your children from all the wrongs of society..all the 'bad' and 'wicked' things out there.  There is only so much one can do though.  So I'm sort of left in the middle.  I don't want to create tension in my household (with my hubby) and I want to handle this in a Christ-like way.  The only thing I DO know I can do right now is pray.  And hard.

My other situation is alot milder than this..thankfully!!  All you ladies out there know how hard it is after you've had a baby.  Your body just isn't the same.  Sure you might get back to where you were before baby..but your body just isn't the same.   So if you guys all remember the incident I had with my neighbor while pregnant and the comment on how I looked like a 'fat cow'..I feel like I've relieved that feeling all over again.  Though the comment made wasn't as bad as that..it came from a source that made the hurt all the same. 

My mother.

I love my mom.  Don't get me wrong.  But sometimes..she talks without thinking.  Prime example of this happened just the other day when said comment was made.  Ah well..I can't please everyone.  I am fairly happy with the way I'm looking almost 5 months after having my girl.  I'm fitting into jeans that were nowhere near buttoning a couple months ago.  Thats progress..right?  Proof of me feeling good about myself..I took a picture a few weeks back of myself on a 'good' day.

(excuse the clutter behind me)

I can handle the hurt feelings..its the first situation that still troubles me.  So I wanted to reach out to my friends in 'blogland' and ask for your prayers.  Prayers that this will get handled properly..with God's will coming first..not my own or anyone else's.  Prayers for my family..and the protection of those at stake.

Our Weekend!

We had a REALLY busy weekend around here!  And now I've got the starts of a cold..not the great ending I was hoping for! 

Friday was quite the day.  We started out attending the funeral of Damons second cousin..he passed away unexpectidly at the age of 44.  So sad.  That afternoon was my 15 year high school reunion (how old am I!).  So it was definately a day filled with ups and downs!  Here is a couple pictures taken of my reunion..we had a good turnout considering...

On saturday..we went to Babcock State Park to take our annual fall pictures!  It was extra special since we had Makayla there for her very first visit!  She did great and the pictures turned out well too!  Here are a few of my favorites...

Sunday was church day, of course.  I made a big mistake of putting Makayla's milk in a sippy cup I'd bought her the day before (don't get me wrong..she LOVES the sippy cup..but I didnt realize how messy they can be!) and had to end up taking her to the bathroom for the majority of the church service to switch it over to her bottle, change her diaper, and get her settled down.  I 'think' she's teething.  Her sippy has a nipple with little bumps on it for teething babies.  She was going to down on that thing!  Oh well..better luck next time!  At least I got to hear a good message by Joel Osteen on tv that morning before we left!  Damon gave me a hug when we got home..he could tell how frustrated I was. 

That was all I needed.....



Fall Slideshow!

Enjoy!!

This digital slideshow made with Smilebox

Missing You Today

Last night as I was trying to fall asleep, I started thinking about my grandpa.  He passed away back in 1998..back when I was in college.  It seems longer than the 13 years that he's actually been gone.  There are so many things he never got to see.  I wish I could turn back time and he could see all the great-grand children thats been born since he's passed.  The marriages thats taken place.  The memories that have been made.  I wish he could have met Damon (they would have gotten along GREAT!).  I would have loved to of seen his reaction the first time he laid eyes on Makayla. 

I have been remembering lately some of the 'little' things he used to do too.  Like how he'd watch me drink a glass of milk with breakfast and smile..knowing I was drinking something that was good for me.  Or how he'd grab my hand..for no reason..and rub it and look at it so intently..like it was the first time he'd ever seen it before.  It was like he was taking in everything as much as he possibly could.  He'd look at me and wouldn't have to say the words "I Love You"..it was in his eyes.  I wonder what nicknames he would have given to the great grandkids he never got to meet.  He had a way of coming up with some crazy nickname for each kid.  For me, it was "Ho-Ho"..simply because I was born in december.  Anytime I come across something that says ho-ho-ho..I always think of him. 

No doubt he would have loved to of seen the husbands and wives, the mothers and fathers, all his grandchildren have become.  My comfort is knowing he watches over all of us..and that one day..we'll be reunited......

25 Things...

I actually did this on facebook last night cause I thought its just one of those fun things to do to get to know people a little better.  I got it from a magazine where they ask a celeb "what are 25 things we may (or may not) know about you".  Here are my "25 Things".

1. I was a blonde when I was little.


2. I can have a lead foot when I drive.

3. I was voted "Shyest" in my graduating class.

4. I was #8 of my graduating class (in the top 10).

5. I almost went to college to become a professional chef.

6. My all time favorite movie is Hope Floats.

7. I met my best friend online.

8. I became a christian at the age of 15.

9. My husband is the only man I've dated.

10. I didn't want children until I was 32.

11. Being a mommy is the best thing EVER!

12. Sometimes singing annoys me..even at a concert.

13. I love the TASTE of coconut but HATE the texture.

14. I love shoes and purses a little too much!

15. I am a cat person, 100%.

16. My grandpa gave nicknames to his kids and grandkids. Mine was "Ho-Ho" because I was born in December.

17. Me and my grandma's birthdays are exactly 1 week apart, and I've always found that neat.

18. Four people in my family (myself included) have their birthdays the same numbers. Mine is 12/12.

19. When I was younger, I could tell you the batting average and most every detail about each of the Cincinnati Reds players.

20. I named my cat after Raven Symone.

21. I'd secretly LOVE to be on Dancing with the Stars..even though I'm not a star.

22. I LOVE magazines.
23. I cried like a baby when I traded in my first car I ever owned for a newer one.
24. Me and Damon watch Hee Haw every sunday night.
25. When we dated, we watched Bull Riding on tv while talking on the phone to each other every sunday night.

You Can't Hide



"The colors of fall can't hide just as we can't hide our sins from God."

This is something I thought of as I was reflecting on my pastor's sermon today.  He was preaching on how no matter what we do..God can see all.  He can see the good we do just as well as the bad.  We can't hide anything from Him.  He can see what we do in 'darkness' and what we do in the 'light'.  Adam and Eve are prime example of this..as they tried to hide from God in the garden of Eden...but of course God knew where they were. 

Something to think of next time we think nobody can see or hear something we might say or do.  You might be able to hide from man..but God can see you.  Just like the autumn leaves..they are in plain sight.  Thats how clearly God can see us.

Letting go..letting God..and rejoicing!

So the past couple of days have been full of thier ups and downs.  Damon got a weekend off..finally!  First since Labor Day weekend in fact..and it was long overdue!  He started a new job in the coal mines shortly after the holiday weekend and he's needed the rest I can tell.  We had a great time out friday..shopping and eating out and buying cute clothes for Makayla.  Its so hard to not come back with something for her every time we're out.  Little girls clothes are so adorable!!  Saturday was spent visiting with family (my parents and Damons mom)..Makayla enjoyed seeing both grandma's and her grandpa.  :-) 

Then saturday night came.  We were relaxing..I got the laptop out and got on facebook.  I had an email from a friend..and she mentioned a post that was on my facebook page from my stepdaughter.  I didn't know what she was talking about cause I hadn't seen it yet.  So I went over and checked it out. 

Ugh.

I felt like I was basically told I was a bad parent because I let Makayla watch saturday morning cartoons.  I made a post earlier that morning that I'd fixed french toast and turkey sausage for us that morning and Makayla was watching cartoons and that she loves tv.  Maybe I read too much into what she said.  She didnt actually use the words 'your a bad parent'..but to me she might as well should have.  She kept talking about how I should be reading to her and how she knows so much on the subject because she is taking a bunch of classes in college on kids and the like (I dont remember exactly what they were called).  She's trying to become a teacher.  I do read to her..sing to her..play with her..and do alot of things with her and yeah we watch tv too.  Anyways..my feelings were hurt BAD.  So bad that I was seeing red.

Uh oh.

Not good.  I had to calm myself.  But I knew I needed to address her directly..because I wasn't going to let my stepdaughter continue to tell me how to raise MY child in the future.  I know she means well..and I told her so..but told her how it made me feel, etc, etc.  She sent me 3 emails afterwards..count them..3.  The first 2 I could tell was wrote off of emotion.  The last she waited an hour after the first 2 were sent and she was calmer.  She was probably regretting some things she'd said in the first two. 

We've wrote again and its really not much better.  Damon knows how upset I was initially..but really didn't have much to say about it.  That didn't help a whole lot.  If there is anyone you want to have your back..its your hubby.  I kinda felt left in the dust. 

So instead of trying to respond back to her (there's really not much I can say to her right now..I'm not mad anymore and I thank God for that)..I'm letting God handle it.  I did alot of praying over the weekend about the whole thing and each email I've sent I've consulted God in beforehand.  Anyone knows that when you type anything online and send it..its sent.  Done.  Once you write words you can't take them back.  God can handle this better than I ever could.  So I'm faithfully leaving it to Him.

What a weight is lifted off of us when we give things over to God!!  God never intended for us to carry burdens and loads..He wants us to give it all to Him.  After all..He is God! 

So..I'm not only rejoicing because I know God is taking care of this for me..but also there is a huge blessing lying right in front of me right now.  What..you might ask?  My best friend in the whole wide world is coming in for a visit this week!!!  We haven't seen each other in over 3 years now and its long overdue.  She lives a state away but its quite a drive..so seeing each other often isn't in the cards.  But since I've had a baby this year..we agreed another visit was in order!  I'm so excited and so happy to show off my little girl to my BFF and to spend some quality time with another sister in Christ. I don't have many friends here where I live..so having her in for a few days is really extra special.  She means alot to me and has been there for me for so many years.  We've known each other for 12 years now and we have an amazing friendship.  One I treasure dearly. 

If you don't hear from me much this week..well what am I saying..I've not exactly been the best blogger since I've had Makayla!  But if you don't hear from me much in the next few days I'm enjoying time with a very dear friend! 

A few prayers about my other situation would be most appreciated as well.  I care about my stepdaughter and don't like it when we have disagreements.