Friday, October 21, 2011

What to do..what to do...

Its been a rough couple of days here at "Country Roads".  I've been battling a cold for a couple days now..SCARED to death I'm going to give it to Makayla.  So I've been washing my hands like crazy and being as careful as one can be while praying she doesn't catch what I have.  Her first cold scares me!!!!  But anyways..I've been going thru some other 'trying' things that I thought I would share with you all without going into too much detail (as not to bore you with my troubles).

I went through some stuff on the lovely land of facebook with my step daughter a few weeks back.  While sharing what I felt was a lovely saturday morning with my little family..I felt totally attacked by my step daughter.  She drilled into me how I needed to be reading to Makayla and not let her watch tv.  Thing is..I DO read to my little girl.  And sing to her.  And play with her.  And yeah..we watch tv with her a little too.  I totally felt attacked and sent her a short email telling her my feelings.  We basically haven't gotten anywhere in regards to the whole situation unless you call not talking to each other a resolution.  Right now..its what is best I feel. 

There are things about her (that I'm not going to go into detail on here) that I've questioned since day 1.  Things that I don't agree with..things that are morally, spiritually wrong.  Things I don't want my daughter exposed to.  Or taught is right.  I feel like I'm in 'momma bear' mode since all of this has happened.  I want to protect my daughter from things of this world..there are things I don't want her exposed to..though I know I can't shield her from every bad thing out there.  Its one of the downfalls to parenting.  You want to protect your children from all the wrongs of society..all the 'bad' and 'wicked' things out there.  There is only so much one can do though.  So I'm sort of left in the middle.  I don't want to create tension in my household (with my hubby) and I want to handle this in a Christ-like way.  The only thing I DO know I can do right now is pray.  And hard.

My other situation is alot milder than this..thankfully!!  All you ladies out there know how hard it is after you've had a baby.  Your body just isn't the same.  Sure you might get back to where you were before baby..but your body just isn't the same.   So if you guys all remember the incident I had with my neighbor while pregnant and the comment on how I looked like a 'fat cow'..I feel like I've relieved that feeling all over again.  Though the comment made wasn't as bad as that..it came from a source that made the hurt all the same. 

My mother.

I love my mom.  Don't get me wrong.  But sometimes..she talks without thinking.  Prime example of this happened just the other day when said comment was made.  Ah well..I can't please everyone.  I am fairly happy with the way I'm looking almost 5 months after having my girl.  I'm fitting into jeans that were nowhere near buttoning a couple months ago.  Thats progress..right?  Proof of me feeling good about myself..I took a picture a few weeks back of myself on a 'good' day.


(excuse the clutter behind me)

I can handle the hurt feelings..its the first situation that still troubles me.  So I wanted to reach out to my friends in 'blogland' and ask for your prayers.  Prayers that this will get handled properly..with God's will coming first..not my own or anyone else's.  Prayers for my family..and the protection of those at stake.

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1 comment:

  1. sounds like you've had quite a rough week! i hope it gets better in the next few days and i'll definitely be sending my prayers your way =)

    p.s. i think you look fantastic for having a little one five months ago!

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