On Easter, we had a forest fire on the mountain behind our house. It was down from us on Easter and not that close to us, but you know, we kept an eye on things.
That all changed on Tuesday.
Around noon that day I saw smoke at the top of the mountain directly behind our house. I kept an eye out all day. Then around 4-5pm I went out in my back yard and it was RIGHT there on the mountain. Keep in mind, we do have a railroad track that separates the mountain from our yard.
But it still made for a scary situation. I called 911 and the fire department was here within minutes. Though they didn't feel the fire would jump the tracks, they sprayed in that direction to wet things down as a precaution 'just in case'. Well, that evening and night I watched as it came further and further down the mountain until it was on the other side of the tracks. I called the mines when I knew Damon was outside to let him know he needed to come directly home instead of showering at work because it was nearing a very large tree that could have endangered our garage and/or our neighbors home. I knew he could reach it with the water hose.
You can see Damon's hat and his striped shirt in the far right..he was spraying the fire at this point.
So he got home and sprayed it down and all was well. Well, except for the 4 or 5 trees that came crashing down on the mountain that night while I was watching the fire. Scary when something like that happens and its dark. You don't know how near it is to you.
It was stressful.
As if all of that wasn't bad, I got up the next morning and checked the weather and facebook real quick before starting my day. I had posted a lot of pictures of the fire on there and was looking to see if I had anyone else I needed to respond to (had a lot of people praying). That's when I learned that Damon's mines was given a 60 day notice.
Again.
If you've been reading my blog for very long, you know we went through a lay off about a year and a half ago.
We might be facing it again.
I cried so hard that day. I had prayed ever since the day he went back to work that God would keep his job safe. I prayed for the mines he worked for specifically. That they'd keep their coal orders, and about the demand for their coal, etc.
I felt defeated. Angry. Sad. Frustrated.
Stressed.
I cried so hard my sides hurt for a couple days. We don't know yet what will become of this lay off. We've heard it might only be 50 jobs at each mine site instead of the whole mines. We are praying. Praying HARD. We ask and desire your prayers, again, for us. God brought us through the last time, and whatever is in store, He will be with us once again. But if you've never been in this situation, you don't know how stressful it really is. The not knowing. The wondering when you'll get that phone call that will get you out of the situation. The wondering when things will feel normal again.
I don't know about you, but at times like that (the moment I learned of the news) is when I realize how weak my faith is. I feel strong at other times about my faith, but when something happens anyways when I prayed for it not to, I felt at that moment, like it was all for nothing.
But its not.
God was there with us, employed or not, and always saw us through anything we faced. Life isn't about being easy, it includes trials and tests of our faith. I want to do better. I want my faith to never waver, regardless of the situation. I know I'm human, and I will fail. But I want to do better. And I will do better.
For with God, nothing (no situation or crisis) is impossible.
Hi Melanie, I read your blog fairly often, but have never commented. First, I wanted to say so very sorry about that fire - it sounds so scary! But when I read about your husband's job I teared up. I feel pressed to share our story with you, and to tell you we're praying. My husband has an MFA (masters in fine arts), which he received in 2006. In the intervening 8 years he has worked for approximately 3 months in his chosen field. He was laid off from a mind-numbing job at a mortgage company in 2007, right after we signed a lease on an expensive apartment that we shouldn't have been able to afford on my income alone. Somehow God provided and not only did we survive on my income alone, but we managed to pay off a good deal of debt. In 2009 I decided to go to law school, and my husband was still looking for work (that's right 2 years of no or not enough work, he was sad and depressed a great deal of that time). In 2010 I got pregnant with our daughter, while in law school, and he managed to get a job with a local hospital, making just over minimum wage. It was another soul-crushing job, working with cancer patients. Don't get me wrong, he loved the patients - but watching his friends die almost daily was too much for a sensitive guy like him. At the end of 2011 he got post-influenza pneumonia and was off work for almost 2 months. He quickly ran out of sick time and I had no income since I was still in law school. Amazingly, God provided again when we had no idea how we would pay our bills - family, friends, yes, even the embarrassing Medicaid and Food Stamps. My husband is still searching for a fulfilling job, still working menial labor at the hospital. He's also dealt with a currently undiagnosed stomach ailment that caused him to miss work monthly with uncontrollable stomach pains. This past December he fell on the ice while walking into work and tore the cartilage in his hip and severely bruised his hip bone. We're not sure when he'll be able to fully return to work and he's taking large doses of pain meds daily. All of this is to say, even though our situations are largely different, I can completely understand that sick, hopeless, angry, frustrated, scared feeling that comes with life spinning out of control. Sometimes I just want to scream WHY? WHY? WHY? Why does life have to be so hard?! (Even though I'm a lawyer now, believe it or not, most of us don't actually make that much money and I have a TON of loans to pay back, plus I'm only working part time right now). But it's times like those that I feel like God nudges me towards gratitude, for the blessings I do have. We sponsor a little boy in Rwanda and holy cow do we have it good here. It's so sobering to hear he used the birthday money we sent to buy his family a chicken! I know I'm rambling, but I'll definitely pray for God's grace on this situation for you guys. Hugs! - Esther
ReplyDelete